wednesday humpty dump

Hello Pilgrams!  I find myself today, bouncing off the walls of my sick building (there is some serious funk in this old building), eyes to the blue sky out my window.  Think I'll go for a stroll through the park and get some fresh(ish) air into me lungs.  I've been "richly scheduled" this morning, plus I'm sporting a new haircut, all the makings for a rocking day.  Yea yea, I am at work, I do commute, wake at the ass crack of dawn, have a messy house to clean and hungry kids... and it all just makes me want to stand in the courtyard handing out free hugs.

Good day to ya!

shashay

Mmmmmm music.  Just love that lift, that pumped up feeling.  Injected a bit of "Mr. Blue Sky" radio into my morning and I am FLYING!!! My mind jumps across a psychedelic background of happy energy.  Too loud and I don't care.  Can we pipe this into the speakers?  All your drab, blank faces.  Take it!!! Take it!!! Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me...

Screw it.  I'm shashaying today.

Tuesday after too little sleep

wake
clothes
coffee
train
drive over the bay
don't crash on the way
b-52s chase off the blues
stretching creaking moan and sigh
wipe that sleep from my eye
maybe if I brush my teeth
I'll find the passion to
live
here
and
now

Thematic photo: 369

Jumping right back in with Written, Inc: Thematic photo: Feeling Nostolgic

How I miss Trento.  This scene, once so familar.  Passed everyday.  The sounds, the light.  The air was different.  Have you felt that?  Another city, just the same you, but what you see, breathe, hear and feel is altogether different.  Does that make a different you?  Do you like that version better?  Is it still there when you've moved on?  Of course. Well, maybe not.  She's lost to time.  To a place. And she lives only in nostalgia.

Drifting

Hello
I have been lost
No
Buried
Hurried
Well...
Gone too long
And drifting

Seems like air to my left
And right
Below me
But that streak in the waves
Caught me
Again
And again

Something real
Not just shadows
Pulled from depths
But solid and alive
Even as my eyes cast recklessly away
At risk of loosing it
And drifting right past
They find it again
And fixated
Here I am
Again

can't cry when we say goodbye

I smile
It doesn't mean I don't care
You've changed my life
Added points of shining light
And that radiates back now

daydreamer

I am so tempted to just move to Amalfi. I love love love that place. Even in gloomy rain. We could a) quit our science careers and move to Amalfi, make enough money doing whatever to survive and never ever leave, or b) keep our science careers, keep living elsewhere, making enough money to travel, invest, explore and retire (early) to Amalfi. When I see it written this way, logic tells me that option (b) is the way to go. But I still daydream about option (a).

47 things

1 I was born in Fort Knox
2 I have three younger brothers
3 I am 6 feet tall
4 My eyes changed color two years ago, from olive green to blue.
5 I broke my left pinky in two places while playing basketball.
6 I'm an excellent packer (everything from groceries to mini-hatchbacks).
7 My favorite children's books are "Pink Magic," "Skippyjon Jones," "Down by the Sea with Mr. Magee," and "Loud Emily"
8 I sing my kids to sleep.
9 My family chocolate chip cookie recipe is written on the back of the Nestle chocolate chip package.
10 I'd like to teach childbirth education classes.
11 I like rain and thunderstorms.
12 I wish I spent more time outside. My ideal house would have a large outdoor living space.
13 I prefer to leave my armpits hairy.
14 As a kid, my birthday dinner was always baked beans, ham and pineapple.
15 is my lucky number.
16 I breastfed both punks until they were over four years old.
17 My secret crush is Mike Rowe.
18 I like photographs of feet.
19 I prefer to sleep in the cold.
20 I love playing basketball, rowing, and rock climbing.
21 I like my marshmallows hot, gooey, and browned to a slight crisp on the outside.
22 Foods I miss most from the US are Mexican, Indian, Thai, Japanese, and Chinese.
23 I play the piano.
24 46 sounds SO sexy to me. I'm looking forward to the next decade.
25 Some of my favorite movies are Orlando, Wings of Desire, Female Perversions, Pane e Tulipani, Stranger than Fiction, Dracula,Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead, Being John Malkovich, Minus Man, The Straight Story, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues
26 Hubby was my one and only one night stand. I failed miserably.
27 I love campfires.
28 The first time I went backpacking I froze my ass off, thought about mauling my guide who was draped in fleece, and nearly fainted at the sight of the stars in the night sky.
29 My favorite smell is Muir woods.
30 Having my arms scratched turns me into pleasure jello.
31 I like shopping at Whole Foods.
32 I would love to ride an Indian motorcycle while wearing lots of black leather.
33 My ability in the culinary arts is up there with the likes of the mother in Better Off Dead.
34 I have no patience for couch potatoes.
35 I prefer pepper over salt.
36 Ben & Jerry's is my favorite commercial ice cream.
37 Muscles are my favorite seafood.
38 September is my favorite month.
39 I like to color. With crayons. In coloring books.
40 I keep my nails short.
41 I don't wear makeup.
42 I like the smell of the incense they use during Catholic Mass.
43 I believe in the spiritual nature of life.
44 I'm more comfortable talking to men.
45 I forgive others.
46 I think I am lucky.
47 For some reason, I've always wanted to visit Morocco.

three things

This is the general structure of a triglyceride. Yea, we're chemists here and we like this freaky stuff. Scary looking bugger. All grabby with those long arms and itchy little double bond Os. (Now I KNOW you're starting to doubt that I'm a chemist).

Well, if you're up on your tryglycerides, then you know that

The National Cholesterol Education Program guidelines for triglycerides are:

Normal	Less than 150 mg/dL
Borderline-high	150 to 199 mg/dL
High	200 to 499 mg/dL
Very high	500 mg/dL or higher
These are based on fasting plasma triglyceride levels.

Of course.

My point? you ask...

Yeah... well, getting to that.

Here's the First Thing. My hubby just found out that his level is 1200.

Normal	Less than 150 mg/dL
Borderline-high	150 to 199 mg/dL
High	200 to 499 mg/dL
Very high	500 mg/dL or higher

Look back at that handy dandy table... normal levels, 150... huh?

No. I didn't mis-type that. It's TWELVE HUNDRED!

He's a freak of nature. Or a walking heart attack. We've got to take better care of hubby. No more Marlboro Man Sandwiches. I guess you have to actually be a cowboy to eat those regularly.


Second Thing...

Nice bike. If you see it around this very north of northern Italian towns, beat the person riding it with your Italian Vogue. Jerk stole it from said hubby from inside our building.

Poor hubby. What is the world coming to!!! Now he can't even continue biking those 10 miles a day to keep his triglycerides in check.


Third Thing.

We get a call from our internet provider that our usage is exceptionally high this month. Well, we've been using it for a year and a half... nothing's new. So, what the...?

Turns out they have not billed us (in a year and a half) and we actually have a plan where we need to pay 2 euros/hour during the week. Weekends are free. That's why they've named it the FREE plan.

telephone guy: you've got the "Free" plan, right?
hubby: yea, that sounds right.
telephone guy: ok, well, that's 2 euros/hour.

Wait. What the ...?



So, later, hubby, distressed says... "oh, what's next... I'm dying, my bikes been stolen, we owe thousands of euros to the internet slime balls... what else is going to happen?!?!"

And this is where, I assuredly tell him, with my all american good sense,

That's three things. Nothing else bad is going to happen. These things come in threes, of course, as all we optimistic gomer smiling, good americans all know. You're done. Kaput. That's it. Finito! Not so bad, right?



Could be worse...
Could be raining...

sbaglio... mistake
My italian is riddled with them
broken and gasping through the discussion of our evening plans
what we "will" do expressed as what we "are" doing
the ten year old patiently corrects my conjugation
again
My hardened brain
I imagine it something like the brains you see floating in glass jars
Rubberized by the American formaldehyde bubble
These sbiglii (?) are one of many weak defenses I have
As my children bob along in the soap
They were American, then Italian, and now American again
Simply comfortable with their reality
Accepting what it presented to them
I'm the only one that sees the past and future
And blinds herself with panic of what will be lost
Or gained.

And in defense of my sanity
I put up blinders and try to see what they see for a time.
All is not lost
They still are what they were
They are evolving, still rich with experiences we worked so hard to give them
Distinctly suffering through their mother's broken Italian
And I see they are fine
And I am also
And sbaglii are essential to where I am
Where I want to go.

they let anyone do this

Irresponsible parenting:

When no one can sleep at 2:37 am, you all go out for donuts.
Starting school holidays a day early just because everyone has had enough.
Watching "The Office" wednesday afternoons with your 7 year old.
Disco dancing in the living room when you really should be getting ready for school.
Leaving the Grandparents to babysit via Skype.
Agreeing with your second grader that his English teacher is indeed an idiot.
Kissing attacks as a form of punishment.

dark closet

Stuffed with wool coats
It's quiet and dark
A safe little space
For big dreamers to park

Ships sailing seas
Across wide stretches of blue
Far foreign faces
I know to be true

Now that I'm reaching far
Fetching dreams of my past
I'm hiding in closets with
New questions to ask

Not yet so sure of myself
As I should
I seek dark quiet spaces
And the graces of good

go fish!

Punkone was sick this week.
Yea, remember him? Sweet little guy is in FIFTH grade. Yeoza. He's so amazing, such a sweet soul and seeming in a constant struggle to cope with the crap that life dishes out.

Sounds a bit jaded, I know.

But the US version of 4th and 5th grade have not been easy on this guy. More specifically, homework is sucking his will to live. As you can imagine, this doesn't sit well with me and I keep myself up a good many hours, devising how I might reverse the tide and inject the joy back into our weekday nights.

OK, so just for clarity... this isn't about "do your homework" kind of stress. This kids does his homework. He's organized, he plans ahead, and just gets to it. It's amazing to me he's related to me at all.

This is about having our time as a family being delegated to providing a right environment for him to do homework in. The environment that we spend a great deal of energy shaping to mean "family" for us. The space where we share stories, act silly, discuss news, laugh at bodily functions, connecting with each other in a way that only we can.

School has him all day. So, yes, it irritates me that it hedges in on my time with him. It irritates me that we can't have a few hours, everyday, in which we do just what we damn well please.

We're evolving. I got us a huge dining room table and it's surrounded by boxes of pencils, glue sticks, rulers, scratch paper... we sit around it all night and chug away at our homework together. We still act silly, discuss, and laugh at our farts. But we all have a bit of sadness in our hearts. A longing for nights when we could sit around the table and play a game of "go fish!"

U - O

umbrella open
colors cast
respite in the rain
with you at last


ombrella aperto
i colori sono cascada
riposo nella pioggia
finalmente con te

you don't win friends with salad

This tune plays through my head
As I reach for the salad tongs
Pile high the spinach leaves
And then almost a bit giddy
Pick my way through the bar...
Beets (always!), carrots, celery
Beans and seeds
Cabbages too, both red and blue
No, not blue
Potatoes, asparagus, mushrooms
Slightly steamed broccoli and cauliflower
Radishes to salt
Drop of guacamole on top
Maybe you can't win friends with salad
But I love making friends with me

an exercise in optimism

leaving at 5 am gets me home by 4
there's no traffic
my neighbor waits patiently at the door
she calls me sweety
Starbucks is open
And I like driving at night
tunnel of light through darkness
gives me time to think
or indulge in a daydream

and about 4 o'clock
we weave and we talk
through paths and events of the day
two beautiful faces so happy to see me
and one a bit later slides his key in the door
although there is much that I miss
I can't quite complain as there's nothing I long for.

distracted

A litany of something in the background
What was it?
"Replace the letter or letters with the letter or letters..."
"What fraction of boys is the least..."
Or something... you lost me at the second letter.
I'm staring at a brick and feeling very good about it.
This is a nice size brick
Painted white.
How odd... I generally don't like the look of painted bricks.
But there is something about this brick
Something unifying, well known.
Hello brick. Have we met?
Stare into it like it understands.
Can you read my thoughts?
I decide I'm certain that it can.
The brick sees all.
Sees the meltdown, smackdown, the lowdown
But still it stays.
I get the sense that the brick gives us the benefit of the doubt.
Knows our good intentions.
Is sure of love and lasting.

Or maybe just lacks the ability to go.
But no
I don't feel anguish or desperation
Or even the absence of a thing
The feeling is good
This is accepting
Even pleased.

"...underlined letter or letters and write the new word"
Like brick, trick, trip, slip, ship, shape, sea, swell, breathe, sigh, neigh...
Sorry. What?

diffraction

When things are right
I see rays of light dance across the bay
Music carries my day
I’m right at home
At home in my heart
And I rightly shine
Until I don’t

When things are right
Morning light marks the new day
Bringing the come what may
The world seems lush green
And wills my being
Until it won’t

When you and I are right
I am never happier in the worst of storms
The world and I get along fine
I can be what I am
Am what I be
That is
until
I’m not

face of the earth

A left and a right and a left-hop-skip
I think I've gone and hopped right off it

I've let myself dive into the persistent cloud-cover,
feeling the gray and gloomy days.
While lush mountains with their woolly green coats
flock the sulking Shepard.
Who sits on her rock and consoles her heart
drawing rivers with a stick in the mud
You see, the earth and the rain are playing a game
coaxing this crab from her shell.
For sit long enough on the most comfortable rock
and your bony ass will get sore
And your numb bum and the soft filtered sun
will cause you to stretch and to eye (unawares)
Whereupon Mother Kesey and her gang of merry pranksters
Swiftly sneeze you into the sky.

punkette me dit

My mash up of Punkette and MIKA:



And she says
why do these stairs hate me?
why do I fall down so much?
world has gained up on me!

And she says
I have so many scrapes
look here's another four
it's true her knees are cut and bruised

And she says
I don't want to play or jump
I just keep getting hurt
I try but then the world fights back

And she says
I give up on this world
Can I watch another show
The couch is the only safe place for me

And she says
as she bites the dust
as she hits the floor
you'll come give her wings
to go back for more

as she get's fed up
and needs to scream and shout
you'll shout with her too
and show her what to do

get up! jump to your feet
get up! come feel the beat
get up! feel the beat
Dance! dance! dance!

...


Really, just an excuse to post MIKA's latest release ;) Danse!